Today was the first day I was able to actually get out and take a walk with my baby Gracie in the stroller. It was great to get out of the house and into the fresh air. Gracie fell asleep during our walk so I think she liked it. : )
My husband went back to work this past week and needless to say this week has been difficult. Taking care of four children....one stuck to your breast all day, one roaming around getting into everything under the sun, and 2 others that fight and bicker constantly has me one step closer to the psych floor...and not as a nurse.
It has been difficult because sometimes I feel like I don't have much support from my family. It would be nice if someone would call and say "hey can I bring you some dinner?" or "can I take the older kids out for awhile so that you can rest?" or "let me hold the baby for a while so that you can take a nap", or "do you need anything? I am going to stop by the store?" The list goes on...Don't they know that I just had a baby.....that my body is still recovering....that when I get up I feel like I have been hit by a truck...that I only get 2-3 hours of sleep at a time.....??? I wish my mom was present.....I wish she was here with me.....not in her own little world. Can you believe she asked me if I was going back to work next week.......a week after I had my baby?
Gracie doesn't seem to be happy unless she is on my breast. You take her off and she screams bloody murder. I am a big believer in breastfeeding and how great it is and how wonderful it is and blah blah blah....but I am telling you....sometimes it is freaking HARD. It is hard to be the sole food provider for your newborn. I feel like I never get a break. She will eat every hour. Growth spurts are continuous around here...
I knew it was going to be hard...
and I know it is all worth it...
my baby is crying...I gotta go.
Hey - It's Laura - I just read your blog and it made me tear up! I really wish I was in Ohio to help you out! I'll be visiting in less than 2 weeks! I can't wait to see my bestie!!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your baby girl! I'm sorry your not getting the help you need. Do you feel comfortable just asking them for help? I wonder if your family just think you're doing okay and maybe they just need to be told that you need help. Maybe you can set up a schedule where your mom can take the older kids a few hours during the week.
ReplyDeleteBreastfeeding is very hard. I remember those days when baby is relentless. Wish I could help you. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine having 3 kids to care for in this newborn stage. Naveen also only wants to feed and I feel so trapped and helpless when Deaglan is acting up and I can't get up to stop him. Breastfeeding is soooooo hard especially when there is no sleep. Last night was the first time that I got three hours in a row since he was born. But I made up for it because after that he wouldn't stop nursing for what seemed like hours.
ReplyDeleteI keep telling myself that this too shall pass because it did with Deaglan. But it is so hard and lonely. It doesn't make it easier that my husband keeps complaining about how much he hates this stage.
I'm sorry that nobody is offering you help. People get so self-centred. I'm thinking about you and feeling so many of the same things.