So I finally weighed myself. I have been avoiding the scale for weeks....I finally just sucked it up and stepped on. NOT GOOD. I am back to my January weight. Oh..My...GoD...I don't know why I do this. I feel like a failure.
Good news is...I am having surgery next week. I am getting my tonsils out. My throat will be sore....I won't be able to swallow without pain...I will definitely lose weight.
Last night I took a long hour walk....and today... I will do it again. Started the day off good with a mushroom egg white scramble.
I know how to lose weight. Something is not letting me... I am keeping myself from this. And now....it is not all about how I look...which....I am hating the way I look and feel right now.....but I need to lose weight for my health....I need to be healthy!
My dad is in the hospital right now with pancreatitis. He is not looking too good. He is in the ICU..with an NG tube, 2 IV's, heart monitors, a foley catheter, a rectal tube, dilaudid PCA. He is wheezing needing breathing treatments...and is very swollen. I almost didn't recognize him when I saw him yesterday. He has diabetes and kidney disease. I was reading on the internet last night...the prognosis doesn't sound too good when you add in the kidney disease. I am just hoping that he will pull through this. My dad is one of the strongest people I know. It just hurts to see him in that hospital bed...looking so helpless and in pain.
I use food to cope. Not good.
If you are the praying type...Please pray for my Dad.....
I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad, Wendy. I will pray for him and all of you.
ReplyDeleteI hope your surgery goes well too. Hugs...
WEndy, I'm so sorry about your Dad. I hope he stays his strong self through that surgery. Also I think you are too hard on yourself. You work hard, have four kids to take care of and are always trying to be healthy. You deserve to be gentle with yourself. The weight will come off but it's only been a year since Gracie.
ReplyDeleteWendy, thinking of you. Know that this is not a failure, just a set back. We all have them. Look at all you have accomplished. You are a great friend, a compassionate nurse, a wonderful mom to 4 adorable kiddos and you're married to a cute brown guy. :op Had to throw that one in there.
ReplyDeleteCarla
I hope that all goes well and really hoping your Dad pulls through this. See you soon. Over some cheesecake! That's diet food, right?