39 weeks

Wow, I made it to 39 weeks...I have never been pregnant this long! Last night I was having some good contractions.....and then they just fizzled out.....and then again this morning I was contracting every 2-5 minutes.....and then they went away. I had another Dr. appointment today which went well. I am dilated to 3 cm and the doctor says my bag of waters is bulging. He thinks I will go into labor this week some time....

Who knows, I will probably still be pregnant next week! lol....

The baby's movement has slowed down a bunch.....and I feel lots and lots of pressure....

Maybe it will be this week....

I have to work a 12 hour shift tomorrow....maybe that will put me into labor!

Sometimes I am ready for the pregnancy to be over.....and sometimes I wish I could just stay in this pregnant state forever. I am getting nervous about labor....I hope I can stay strong. I hope my labor goes fast....

I can't wait to meet my new little baby....


Gosh, I am all over the place in this post.....I blame it on my pregnant brain.

38 weeks

38 weeks and counting...

• Made up for my 1 pound loss last week with a 5 pound gain this week! AAAHHH!
• having sporadic contractions
• my cervix is finally dilating...2-3 cm and 60% effaced
• feeling pretty good
• lots of pressure though
• still not ready to have this baby yet
• the suspense of when labor is going to begin is kind of fun
• daydreaming about how my labor will go is fun
• I think I forgot about how painful it is going to be
• that kind of makes me nervous
• my fingers are like sausages
• going to get my hair did today
• still need to pack my bag for the hospital
• I sure do hope I don't deliver on Saturday...my doctor is going out of town
• and the kids are dancing at the world affair...and I have to work on Saturday
• still loving every minute!

Maddie's Birth Story

I have to say that Madelyn's birth story is my favorite...maybe because I had an incredible VBAC...

It all started one early Saturday morning. I was just laying in the bed, snuggling with my baby girl Allie...we were talking about school and life...I was enjoying our little conversation and quiet time together. Ervin had just left to find us some breakfast. I roll over to change positions and all of a sudden I feel a "pop" and then warm fluid in my underwear....my water broke! I stand up right away and feel the trickle down my leg. I run to the bathroom just to make sure that it is not pee I am feeling. NO....that is amniotic fluid for sure! I call Ervin and calmly tell him that my water just broke...and so he rushes home. I was kind of bummed because I knew my doctor was out of town and I would be delivered by the doc on call.

I was not feeling any contractions....and since I was a previous cesarean section, I thought I should call the doctor. He tells me I should go into the hospital to get checked out... I decided he was right....I thought since I was a little high risk I should make sure everything is ok.

My water broke around 8 am and we got to the hospital around 10-11ish. I was totally wishing that my contractions would start already!

They checked me in and they waited for the doctor to arrive. The doctor checked my cervix and said I was 3 cm. He wanted to start pitocin because my contractions were non existent. He also put in an intrauterine pressure catheter....it is an internal monitor to monitor the strength of my contractions.

Shortly thereafter, the nurse starts the Pit and I start having regular strong contractions. I labored mostly in a rocking chair . I tried the birthing ball for a few minutes but was not a big fan. Once the pain started to get bad I was checked again and was 5 cm and 0 station. Less than an hour later I was ready to push. I pushed maybe 5 times and she was born! The pain was outrageous....I think I may have said the F word....maybe.... just once : 0 ) But...

It was the most amazing experience of my life! I had natural childbirth! I didn't have any pain medications through my IV and I didn't have an epidural. I was so proud of myself. It gave me a high that I really cannot describe. It was amazing! The best part was that I was awake to see my baby! and I contributed to getting her out! No feeling of helplessness this time!

Madelyn Justine

Born October 18, 2008 @ 2:50 P.M.

7 pounds 11 oz. 19 in. long

Our first pic together

Jacob, Allie and Daddy peeking in on our new little bundle of joy!

Allie's Birth Story

A few weeks after finding out I was pregnant with Allie, I started working in labor and delivery as a nurse. I was working full time and learning the ins and outs of delivering babies. It was a stressful yet exhilarating time in my life. I loved the excitement and the adrenaline rush I would get when we would have a stat c/section for a baby in distress....rushing the mom to the operating room, shoving a foley catheter into her bladder....watching anesthesia put her to sleep.....and then the doctor cutting into her as fast as they could to get that baby out......the
"decision to incision" less than 20 minutes....we saved that baby's life.....


I was around 37 weeks during a routine OB visit when the doctor heard an arrhythmia in Allie's heart beat. He set up an ultrasound which turned out to be fine....the tech didn't hear or see any problems with the heart. The doctor said......."well, whenever you work again, just get on the monitor and we will do a non stress test to make sure the baby is ok." I was scheduled to work on a Saturday and it turned out that we weren't that busy so they put me on call. A few hours later my co-worker calls and says that the doctor wants me to come in and get on the monitor.....so I come in.

Allie was not very cooperative. Her arrhythmia was loud and clear and her heart beat tracing would hardly pick up on the monitor. The doctor wanted to go ahead and induce my labor. I was already 3 cm dilated and thinning so he thought it was time. They started me on pitocin....and then then he broke my water and placed an internal monitor on the baby's head so that we could pick her heart beat up better. Not much longer after that, the heart tones plummeted.....it sounded like her heart beat was in the 80's....arrhythmia or not...? it was hard to tell. 10 minutes of flipping side to side, oxygen, iv fluid bolusing and shutting off the pitocin I hear the doctor say "Open the OR!" The next thing I know he shoves a foley catheter in my bladder and I am being whisked away to the operating room.

At that point I start crying. I was soooo scared! It was surreal. All these months I was the nurse taking care of the mom and baby in distress......and then all of a sudden.....I was the patient laying on the OR table....crying....scared....

Meanwhile, Ervin is scared to death, stuck in the hallway, worrying if everything was going to be ok.

Anesthesia puts me to sleep........(after they yell at me to stop crying because I had too many secretions)

Next thing I know, I wake up to a tube in my throat, gagging uncontrollably.......and in PAIN.

My baby was out.....and she was doing fine....her apgars 8 and 9.....her cord blood gases normal...

After taking the breathing tube out, I was taken to the recovery room. I was in lots of PAIN. It was horrible. I didn't even want to breastfeed my baby because the pain was so horrible. As I came around, I just kind of felt empty and defeated......

I didn't do anything to help get this baby out. I was asleep when she arrived. I missed out on the birth of my baby girl. I was sad.

We don't have many pics of Allie as a brand new person because it was so emergent. We were not prepared to have a baby that day. We didn't have our camera with us. Here are a few shots of us the next day....

Allison Juliet

Born April 3, 2004

8 pounds 0 oz., 21 in. long

I was so thankful that Allison came out ok . She continued with the arrhythmia for awhile, but it resolved on it's own and she is as healthy as can be now.

I will never forget that experience. I feel like it has made me a better nurse because I know what these mom's go through....and it's not easy. Whenever I have a patient rushed to the OR and under general anesthesia, I can't help but think of my very own experience every time......

36 weeks

I am 36 weeks pregnant as of yesterday! I can't even believe it. My due date is May 24th and it is hard to believe that May is next week! I had a doctor appointment today which went fine. My urine and Bp's are fine.....I gained another 4 pounds this week...which brings the weight gain to 33 pounds total...had my GBS culture done and since he was down there he checked my cervix. I am CLOSED...but soft. I was kind of hoping I would be a little bit dilated! But hey, I am not in any hurry! I have never made it to 39 weeks before....so maybe I will this time! I am hoping to at least make it past May 16th. That weekend is the weekend of the World Affair. Jacob and Allie will be performing Filipino Folk dances and I sooo don't want to miss any of that! and let's not forget about the delicious food!

The uncomfortableness has started for sure.... pelvic pressure, heartburn, sciatica, shortness of breath, and the slow walk...the waddling has begun. But, I am still enjoying the pregnancy. It is going to be over before I know it. I am not ready for it to end.

I am enjoying those kicks...

Jacob's Birth Story

In anticipation of the upcoming birth of my baby, I have decided that I want to revisit the past births of my children. I have had 3 different kinds of births and the experiences have kept me wondering what is in store for me next. I plan to go into labor on my own! No induction! No repeat c/sections either! I plan that my labor will be fast and easy! and hopefully I can do most of my laboring at home and not in the hospital attached to monitors! Wishful thinking huh? Well, my first birth wasn't easy. It was long. It was painful. It was exhausting!

I was 23 years old, in nursing school. I had just finished my OB rotation and thought "I am going to get an epidural for sure!!!" That was my only plan. I didn't have an elaborate birth plan. Just a plan to get an epidural! A few days before I delivered I swore I was leaking water. I went to the doctor and he reassured me that I was not ruptured and that I should just go home and relax. I evidently had been peeing on myself! He checked my cervix and said I was 2 cm dilated and he scheduled me for an induction just 2 days later. I was only 38 weeks! Hey, I was all about it! I was tired of being pregnant and I wanted the baby out! I was so over clinicals and nursing school. I just wanted to be done. The next day, I still felt the leaking...but I ignored it thinking I was still just peeing on myself....but that night I started feeling crampy and started seeing some bloody show. I called my doctor and he was not impressed. He says..."I checked your cervix yesterday so you will have a little bloody show, that is normal." The pain seemed to get worse and I just didn't feel good. We decided to head to the hospital. I was going to be induced in the morning anyway....why not go in a little early.

Here I am a few days before delivering, sometime in March 2002.

So, we get to the hospital after being pulled over by the police! Ervin was a little nervous and was driving a little erratically. The police let us go without a problem after he found out we were headed to the hospital to have a baby! Once we got there and signed in, they placed me on the monitors. The baby's heart beat was really high, they said.....and I had a fever. I didn't even know I was sick! I was just having some pain. I was still only 2 cm! They started me on antibiotics and pitocin. The pain became unbearable and the nurse insisted I should get some IV pain medication. I definitely didn't put up a fight....but I have to say that the nubain did nothing for my pain, and my husband.....he was sound asleep on the couch! SNORING!

This is how I spent my whole labor, on oxygen and stuck in bed.

I eventually got an epidural! Thank God for EPIDURALS! It was the best thing! My pain was gone! and so was the feeling from my tummy down to my toes! I felt nothing....just NUMB! When it was time to push, I felt nothing! I pushed for hours and I swear, I must have been a horrible pusher. I couldn't feel anything! The doctor finally comes in and puts the vacuum on the baby's head to help me out....and even then it took forever. I probably pushed for 20 more minutes even with the help of the vacuum.

Jacob finally came out with apgars of 3 at 1 minute and 8 at 5 minutes. When Jacob was born he looked dead. He was totally blue and limp. No crying, no coughing. That's when I knew that motherhood was not going to be easy. I wanted to jump out of the bed myself and help resuscitate the poor little guy! But, he came around and finally started crying.

Born March 15, 2002 at 1:59 pm, 8 lb. 6 oz. 20 1/4 in. long.

Jacob's birth was and still is one of the happiest times in my life.
Becoming a mom is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

When I look back at that story I wish I knew then what I know now.

Allie and Maddie's birth stories to follow!

Oh, are you pregnant?

I decided I would finally post a preggy pic of me....I am 33 weeks pregnant.....but do I look pregnant? Maybe....maybe not! I still get the "Oh are you pregnant?" question. I WISH I looked pregnant! I don't care how big my belly would be.....I just wish someone would say...."Dang, did you see her? She is pregnant!" lol......One of my co-workers was being nice and said..."oh you just carry the baby differently..." that line means......You are fat...and the baby is hiding behind all that fat. It is okay...I have accepted the fact that I will never be one of those cute beautifully pregnant women with the basketball belly. It sucks. But, here I am...Fat and pregnant at @ 33 weeks.....

Enjoy it. Cherish it. Love it.

What exactly am I talking about? Well....I am talking about pregnancy! As a labor and delivery nurse I have no sympathy for the preggy lady that comes in and complains about how tired they are of being pregnant and how they are soooo uncomfortable and how they are soooooo ready to "get this f#cking baby out" right now! I don't really care how much "pressure" you're feeling in your vajayjay because you know what? I am feeling that pressure too and you know what, I am on my feet for 12 hours straight! I don't care that you are nauseated and vomiting....you are pregnant! You will have nausea and vomiting! I guess I should feel some compassion towards these women but it is really hard when you see and hear it day in and day out and you are living it. The other day we had a woman come in and complain of "chest pain". The doctors worked her up and everything came back negative.....but they decided to induce her. After she heard the words, "induce" her chest pain magically went away. She never complained of that pain again. So many women want to be induced and really it is not the best way to go. There are risks involved and I wish more women would be proactive in educating themselves about the risks of induction and risks of C/Sections. Women are scheduling C/Sections for "vaginal preservation". WTF? What about that big ass incision on your abdomen? or the risks of infection, hemorrhage, and injury to other organs just to name a few. If you need a C/S, that is one thing, but if you are scheduling one because it is "easier" that is another! Going into labor on your own is sooooo much easier! What I am trying to point out here is that pregnancy is not easy. Sometimes it is not fun. Sometimes it is uncomfortable. You got pregnant and you will be pregnant for 40 weeks. 40 weeks people. Not 37 weeks, not 38 weeks, 40 weeks!

This is my last pregnancy and I am enjoying every last minute of it. I am not saying that this pregnancy is easy. I am not saying that I am not uncomfortable because I am. I am saying that I am happy that I can carry a baby to full term, and that I am lucky too. I am lucky to even be pregnant. I am cherishing every minute of this pregnancy. Every kick, every nudge, every ache, every pain, every hiccup, every burn....I am loving it! I am so excited to see this new baby boy or girl. But, in the meantime.......I am loving the precious time this baby and I have to just ourselves. This pregnancy will come to an end. I am not going to be pregnant forever....... I am enjoying it, cherishing it, and loving it.

I only have about 9 more weeks to go. I cannot believe that!

FAILED!

I failed my 1 hour glucose tolerance test. To pass you need to be at 140 and under.....mine was 152....so not too awfully high.....but high enough where I am going to have to take the 3 hour glucose test, which in my opinion is pure torture! The last time I had to take that test I felt so horrible......fasting........drinking that awful 100 gm of liquid orange sugar..... and then getting your blood drawn 5 times in 3 hours is not my idea of a fine time....and what else am I supposed to do for 3 hours at the doctors office! I just hope I pass.....I do not want to be a gestational diabetic! Although today I felt like a diabetic. All at once I was sweaty, shaky, and hungry! I had to get some food in me fast or I was going to pass out. Yeah, it was that bad. I was hypoglycemic! For breakfast I had pancakes......no protein.....it is Friday and like a (good) catholic should.....I didn't eat meat....well, I think that is what did it to me! During my hypoglycemic moment, all that went out the window and I had some left over chicken curry and rice from this new Indian place we tried. That hit the spot!

My 27 week appointment went well. I gained another 4 pounds this month.....(sigh) but other than that everything has been going well. My heartburn has progressively worsened.....but the pepcid helps. I am at the point where I go to the doctor every 2 weeks now. I cant believe that I will be in my third trimester next week. This pregnancy is going by fast!

Where have you been?

I went to kickboxing class today and I must say it was fabulous! I had such a great time! The music was great and the class was full. I saw a few girls that I haven't seen in a while...... and they probably think..."omg....she has gained weight! It is a good thing she came back!"

Yeah, I am 6 months pregnant, but I look.....Fat. Yes, my stomach is bigger and rounder....but it is still flabby and soft. I look like a fatty. People would never know I was pregnant unless I told them I was.

I am really proud of myself for actually taking the initiative to go to kickboxing class. I modified the jumping jacks, power squats, and shuffles to low impact and still had a great workout. I felt pretty good during the whole hour......but now I am feeling sciatica in my left buttocks area....lol..but it reminds me that I am strong...and healthy enough to exercise...and that makes me feel better about myself. I am so used to being on a "diet" in the beginning of the year that I actually miss....being on a diet.....but pregnancy will not stop me from choosing healthy options and exercising......and it sure won't stop me from eating as much chocolate as I want either.....unless I fail my glucose test.....which is in a few days. Update on baby to come......

Pregnant and exercising! Me! Yeah me!

I exercised today!!!! and it felt great!!!! I took the kids to the YMCA to get some exercise too. We all need to get out of the house and stop playing our Wii and DSi's. I decided the other day that this is the best I have felt during any pregnancy! It really is wonderful to feel so good right now. First the kids and I walked the track. They got pretty bored with that really fast and soon all I was doing was yelling at them! So I took them to the nursery. I peeked into the aerobics studio and saw my most favorite instructor teaching....and I thought....hmmm should I try? I am pregnant.....will it be too intense? .....and then I saw like 2 other preggy women in there....so I joined right in! It felt great! I haven't been to kboxing class in months......MONTHS! Now, I was very late to class....because I wasn't planning on doing that class.....so it was only 10 minutes long. It was a great 10 minutes though. Then I got on the good ole treadmill for 30 minutes (just walked) . I held on to both of the side bars so I wouldn't trip or fall. All in all it was a pretty good workout for me. I realized that I can and need to do this more than once in a while. I saw all kinds of pregnant people exercising....and so can I!!! I am planning on exercising on my days off during the week. Hopefully this will hinder some of my weight gain and hopefully keep diabetes away. I do not want to fail my glucose test!

Oh, and I had my ultrasound yesterday too! The tech said everything looked great! I was very relieved and actually felt a weight lift off of my shoulders. She gave me a free DVD of the whole thing which was nice. AND! I stayed strong and did not peek at the parts between the legs! So, I will be surprised when he or she arrives in May!

Week 19 baby update

I had my ultrasound yesterday which went "okay". Okay meaning I left feeling more nervous about my baby's health than relieved to know that he/she is doing great in there. The tech could not see all of the anatomical parts on the baby like the 4 chambers of the heart. I had an appointment afterwards and the Dr. said it was the baby's position that didn't allow her to get all of the measurements. He didn't seem worried but he did offer me a level 2 ultrasound in 4 weeks which I agreed to. So, now I am more worried than usual. I know that it is probably nothing but I just can't help but worry.....and I did stay strong in not finding out the sex of the baby....the tech said the legs were crossed anyway!

I also gained 8 pounds this month!!! WHAT!!! CRAZY!!! The doctor was like " so you know you had a big jump in the weight this time..." Me - " oh....ummmm....I don't think I have been eating more than usual...." (trying to defend myself) ... Doctor "It is okay....it is not your fault... it is probably water weight....you cannot control that....." LOL....I love my doctor! Now that I think about what I have been eating (cookies, candy, eating out more that 50% of the time) it is amazing I didn't gain more! In my defense....I did just get off work, I ate a big Bob Evans breakfast before my visit, I kept my shoes on this time because I was afraid my feet would stink after 14+ hours on my feet! At any rate it was an eye opener. I do need to watch what I put in my mouth....and I am going to start going to the gym now that I am starting to feel better. I do not want to gain 60 pounds during this pregnancy! Wish me luck!

Baby Update

I had a doctor's appointment today which went well. I heard my baby's heart beat for the first time ever. Something about that first time is something special. It would have been more special if I hadn't been so focused on the baby next to me crying! I brought Maddie along with me and she was one big grouch! I was trying to calm her as the doctor was searching for heart tones.........when he found them and Maddie was quiet it was a great sound to hear. I then had my labs drawn and they already scheduled my ultrasound for late December. This pregnancy is moving right along. I was prescribed some zofran......(thank God) because the nausea is unreal...I am nauseated all day it seems......it does come and go....and some days are better than others.......but I am really sick of it....literally. It is mind boggling to me how I can puke 4-5 times a day..... have nausea all day.......and still gain weight! What is up with that? I guess that is just how I roll. I am up 3 pounds.....and my clothes know it too. I have no clothes that really fit me. When I see my body in the mirror....it looks like one saggy stretch mark! GROSS! But I am dead serious......maybe I should say.....saggy and full of stretch marks. My whole body has stretch marks on it.....(sigh).......... anyway...yes I am only 11 weeks......and yes....I am wearing maternity pants!